Photo by Gabrielle Henderson on Unsplash
Before we get started I wanted to thank everyone who has subscribed already! We broke through the first milestone I had, 50 free subscribers, this week which was two months earlier than I expected. The support has been incredible - thank you!
A “one-on-one” with your Manager is your most powerful career growth tool and, yet, many people treat these sessions with indifference. If you don’t have a regular one-on-one on your calendar, make getting one scheduled your top priority (also consider finding a new Manager because that is a bit of a 🚩).
I love one-on-ones with my team because these sessions represent a great opportunity to get to know and understand someone at a personal level. My belief is that the one-on-one is not a meeting, it is a collaborative working session where the topic is: you. The effort that you put into preparing for this session will directly influence how much value you get out of it.
How do you do it?
First, prepare. Let’s assume that you are meeting with your Manager weekly for thirty minutes or every other week for sixty minutes. That means you have roughly two hours of collaboration to structure each month. There is incredible return on investment potential here if you do it right so plan to spend time getting your agenda setup. Thinking about what you want to talk about while you are waiting for the session to start is not the right way to do this.
Second, listen. I can’t quantify the number of times I have been asked about growth or promotions in one-on-ones only to observe someone “waiting to speak” while I am responding. Instead, try your best to be an active listener. Take notes so that you can refer back to that feedback in the future.
Third, follow-up. Regardless of what is discussed, if any action items are identified, understand the timeline and be proactive in offering follow-up. Nothing builds trust and confidence between a Manager and a member of the team more than when someone says they will do something and then does it (we aren’t talking about a huge hurdle to leap here).
If you did just those three things, your one-on-ones will be so much more effective. And you control them! There is no certification to get or special talent you need to have to get those three things right. You have all the skills today, right now. Just put them into practice.
Going further
Owning your one-on-one is one of the best ways to own your career. You don’t need to share a formal agenda with your Manager, but you should write down what’s on your mind so that you have a reference. A structure that I think works really well is this:
Administrative updates. Anything important that is coming up (e.g. PTO) within the next couple of weeks that isn’t directly tied to your job function and performance.
Proactive request for feedback on something coming up. I am not saying “something that happened.” If you ask for feedback on something that already happened that was more than a few hours ago without your Manager having the time to think through that feedback, you are going to get something very generic that you probably will be dissatisfied with. Instead, proactive requests get your Manager ready to provide feedback at a future date.
Consider this simple scene:
You: I’m going to be preparing some materials for the Project ABC Status Meeting in a couple of days. Do you mind if I send those over to you before so I can get your feedback on them?
Manager: Yes of course, happy to take a look through the materials.
You: Great! I’m also hoping that you can provide me with some feedback on how I run the meeting. There are some assertive personalities on the team and I want to be better at keeping things on track.
Manager: Yes, some of the people on that meeting are a challenge. More than happy to provide some feedback.Your Manager is now primed for the meeting and understands that it isn’t just about the meeting anymore. I love these types of proactive requests because it creates a great coaching opportunity that doesn’t need to feel like it originated from a situation that went sideways.
Challenges and areas of concern. What have you observed within your day-to-day that is making work harder? This could be the responsiveness of a peer team or complexity in an operating procedure (among a million other things). Good managers need this feedback and offloading some of this to them will help make the team better. Be sure to not stop at just naming the thing that is concerning, articulate why you are concerned about it.
Long-term growth areas. It can be difficult to add this in every one-on-one, so consider this as a monthly/quarterly discussion point. If you and your Manager have a new relationship, outline what your career goals are for the next two to five years. Not sure what your career goals are for the next two to five years? This is a good prompt to think about them.
Project updates and Manager questions. Your Manager likely has one or more things that they want to be updated on. A quick blurb on each of those topics is a perfect way to close out the meeting. Even better, have those blurbs typed out and ready to send at the conclusion of the meeting. You will get a lot of bonus points for that type of behavior.
But my Manager dominates our one-on-one!
Most of what your Manager does in their day-to-day is attend scheduled events and meetings. Having this laundry list of items floating, unorganized in our brains can lead to a brain dump of topics that suck all of the air out of the one-on-one.
Don’t let us do this!
Establishing some structure to the one-on-one will ground Managers on what matters to you. This is your meeting and your opportunity to own your career growth. Again, don’t let us take up all of the time.
And don’t be discouraged if your first few one-on-ones using this approach don’t feel that different from your previous sessions. It takes time to reframe the session, but it will happen. Stick with it.